Grow From Your Suffering
To gain relief from suffering is to learn more about it. For most of us, learning about our suffering feels like the last thing we want to do. It’s quite natural to move away from potential negative feelings and natural to move towards things that provide good feelings. But, sometimes moving or avoiding does not work. Sometimes suffering persists like a menacing shadow determined to get your attention. When pain plagues you more than you can stand, and you get a moment to wonder what it wants you may decide to get a better look at it with support at your side.
To look at difficulties is not so easy. As human beings we have had to developed many ways over many years to manage, cope and hide our suffering. For some, it may be possible to rise above it with the careful and regular practice of certain coping skills or self care activities. For others, suffering can threaten to take over. When suffering intrudes more often than not, it may generate a an urgent desire to find answers and get free.
One thing that makes suffering difficult to change is that it often lives largely beneath the surface, away from rational thought and therefore out of our direct control. To learn about suffering in order to change it, is to approach the problem indirectly. There are paths to follow in symptoms like negative thoughts, unregulated sleep, mistakes, patterns of behavior, as well as bodily sensations, complaints and issues.
To find relief and deeply change the nature of your suffering means to enter a process of growth and personal development as a person. In my experience, it requires another person who is personal and separate from the rest of your life. Having professional help on your side, to support, guide and help make sense of it is essential to gaining relief.
Reasons for Seeking Therapy
- You find yourself suffering more often.
- Your efforts to solve or change aren’t enough.
- Something about your pain doesn’t make sense.
- You have a question about yourself.
Starting in Therapy
Psychotherapy helps people with a wide range of issues. Whatever it is that causes you pain right now, there is no wrong way or place to begin speaking about it in therapy. You may find one of the following issues speaks to you. Or, you may have your own unique way of naming your distress.
Strong, stressful feelings
Strong, stressful thoughts
Finding it difficult to say no
Ongoing stress having a relationship
Ongoing distress about a past or impending loss
People telling you to go to therapy
Painful or intrusive memories
Family of origin issues
Sexual difficulty without an organic cause